Wednesday, August 20, 2008

The Gourmand


The Scene: Mama and son putting hotdogs and burgers (2 of each) on the grill for said son's little snack.

Mama:  Do you want me to slice some tomatoes and a vidalia onion for you?
Augie: No thanks.
Mama:  Do you want to toast these buns?
Augie: No thanks.
Mama:  Do you need me to help you with this anymore?
Augie:  No thanks.  I just wish we had all the stuff that makes them taste like the ones at Wal-Mart.  They have the best burgers and dogs.
Mama:  Wal-Mart?  They have a restaurant? You go there to eat? What makes them so good?
Augie:  I dunno...their food is the best.
Mama:  ~~~

31 comments:

Hilary said...

It's probably not the Vidalias...

Camellia said...

I bet he has never had a crystal burger. Non food. Evolution.

TSannie said...

Speechless....I am simply speechless....

Chesapeake Bay Woman said...

I'm going to go out on a limb here (where I stay and live, by the way), and say that I agree with your son.

In my rural area there is a dearth of good restaurants (or any restaurants for that matter), and Wal-Mart does fill a certain void. Their potato wedges are outstanding.

Of course you're talking to someone who also eats instant mashed potatoes, so please take all of this with a grain of salt.

Big Hair Envy said...

You haven't failed as a mother, it's the big box advertising that hooks those teenagers in! It's beyond their control........and ours! He'll work through it:)

asthmagirl said...

Vidalia onions... mmmm!

Seriously, they have food at Walmart? Really? I must need to get out more!

Mary said...

I think an intervention may be called for... I'm just saying.
xoxo,
Mary

Mental P Mama said...

hilary: I believe you're right.
camellia: I grew up in the South. And I lived on crystal burgers. Maybe that crap is in his DNA.
annie: aren't you impressed with that??
CBW: lol. I would have to take those instant mashed taters with a very LARGE grain of salt.
big hair: thanks, I needed that.
asthmagirl: I think you should stick with your pub.
mary: will you come lead it?

winetipper said...

Oy. Talk about disheartening. And disturbing. I'd be tempted to mention in an offhand manner that you didn't realize he liked horsemeat, and then never, ever tell him you're kidding. I know it's bad to deliberately cause one's children angst, but this is serious -- we're talking about food here! :^)

Flea said...

Oh fer real? Smack that boy.

Caution Flag said...

Here's the mysterious part: I'm with him, but for me it's Home Depot dogs. And that's why none of my friends allow their kids to eat at my house.

Daryl said...

OY



At least he didnt say Nedicks


:-Daryl

Keetha said...

Oh, goodness. Does he mean McDonald's?? Around these here parts, the Wal Marts have McDonald's in them.

But. Like Chesapeake Bay Woman, I will say that junk food has its place. For my money, not much beats good greasy fried potato wedges and chicken strips from a convenience store.

I'm getting hungry.

Laura ~Peach~ said...

typical!

tj said...

...Mmmmm mmm! WalMart dining - is there anything better? Oh yeah, roadkill! *gack*giggle*lol... Just kidding, just kidding...lol... ;o)

...Blessings...

Starwoodgal said...

I remember when our Walmarts had a snack bar. Long time ago. Now they have McD.

Well - he's a man, a guy, male if you will. Fighting testosterone is hard work. :)

Greta said...

Ba ha ha ha ha!

dlyn said...

Now that is hilarious - gotta love kids!

Mental P Mama said...

Wino: lol
flea: tried to, couldn't catch him.
caution: ewwww.
daryl: you said it.
keetha: no, it's some other form of ground food.
peach: right?
tj: gag.
starwoodgal: you got that right.
greta: easy for you to say;)
dlyn: he is available to come help in your garden;)

WORKING MOM said...

Figures. WE try and try, and they just don't appreciate our gourmet cooking.

noble pig said...

Oh geez isn't that the way the world works. I would have handed the five bucks and said off you go sweetie pie!

Susiewearsthepants said...

Well, I guess there no accounting for taste :)

MamaGeek said...

Oh good Lord. Oh good Lord.

Oh good Lord.

:)

Krysta said...

the wal mart's around here all have mc donalds...

Jules said...

Um, OK?

Bear Naked said...

Walmart??????????

Never been in one, won't ever be in one.

Bear((( )))

Alias Liz Jones said...

Watch out. It may be opiates in the burgers. The first one is free at Wally. I don't trust the price breaker smiley dot man/thing.

holly said...

they *make* it so it's addictive like crack. why else would they love it. it's like the great mini-mart nacho addiction of the 80s.

when it's right it's right.

Country Girl said...

Sheesh. Sounds familiar . . .

Sassy said...

Sons....ya gotta ♥ them!

Egghead said...

Walmarts around here have Subway Deli's in them. No accounting for large appetites that belong to sons. They usually will eat the bark off of a tree.