Thursday, September 25, 2008

P.T. Barnum Was Right

There is a sucker born every minute.
And, apparently, I am one.
I have high hopes.
I plan on waking up a size zero in a matter of days.
With smooth skin and clear thoughts.
And because I love you so much,
I'll keep you posted.
Do you think I should go buy all new clothes today?
I may be so detoxed by tomorrow that I have nothing to wear.


Or maybe not.

UPDATE:
I don't know if these things will do everything they claim, but they did something to me.  First, they turned pitch black during the night.  It could just be hot feet, but I sleep in a refrigerated room, so I doubt it.  Second, my dreams were very vivid.  It could have been the pot roast and spoon bread I had for dinner, but I doubt it.  Third, they may smell like lavender going on, but in the morning?  Nope.  More like bacon.  Or something.  All I know is that my dog Dora was with me when they came off my feet, and I haven't seen her since.  

35 comments:

Ellen said...

Now, will they suck the effects of alcohol out of your feet too?

Please let us know how they work - I just picture them deep cleaning the soles of your feet, thus the dirty pads.

Sara said...

I really want to know if those things work. Pleez keep us posted.

Chesapeake Bay Woman said...

I believe I saw a program that wanted to prove whether those (or something similar) worked or not, and the end result was they did not. They do remove some things from your system, but not anything that would be critical to remove or that your kidney or liver hadn't already taken care of. The end result of the program was don't bother.

That doesn't mean you shouldn't go out and buy yourself some clothes though. Or shoes. Or wine, speaking of livers.

Living on the Spit said...

Hey, we need all the help we can get, right? Let me know how these work. I need to detox. Yes, on going clothes shopping!!! Get bigger bags...I heard they make you look like an anorexic teenager...at least that is what I hear? Have a great weekend. Love ya,

Marlene

imbeingheldhostage said...

hmmm, I'll wait to hear your results.
It's true that bad things enter your body through the skin, but removing 30 xtra pounds of fat and cellulite out of it-- now THAT I would buy. Heck, I'd volunteer to be their poster child!

Anonymous said...

I will be anxiously waiting to see or hear the results. If they work for you, I have been known to be a sucker too.....but this time I will be a sucker once removed!

Nurse Nancy

TSannie said...

Proof that you are a mental mama... ;-)

kim-d said...

I will be waiting for the verdict on this; it may take me a day or two extra due to extra fat but, after that? Let's go clothes shopping for new size 2 wardrobes together! And then we can go out for copious amounts of wine and a little lunch. Because if we gain any weight, we can just slap another little gauze thing on our feet and we'll be good to go again. I'm excited :)!

Big Hair Envy said...

I saw those things in Target last week. PLEASE let us know if they work! I can't wait to be able to wear all of my daughter's cute little size 2 clothes. I won't even have to go shopping....unless I want to :)

Laura ~Peach~ said...

LOL I will watch and see how you dissapear before I try them :)

as for the flowers I dunno... i just know my mother in law got some sticks one year 15 or so years ago and rooted them then planted them and this is what grew out of it... she said they are called a confederate rose tree and one year we took some sticks in the fall and stuckl them in a bucket of water planted them the next spring and every ear they come back :)

Bear Naked said...

You would think they would have used a better pair of feet for the picture.
EW--UGLY TOES--UGLY TOES

Bear((( )))

TSannie said...

Ok, I'm goin' to CVS after work to pick up some of those puppies!

Suz @ Alive in Wonderland said...

To get the effect you would like from these things, wouldn't you have to wear them on your forehead? or for me...my derriere?

Caution Flag said...

I still want a Ped Egg and can't find one. What if I found a package deal: a ped egg AND these pads? Maybe the pads are worth it just for the dreams??

Flea said...

Seriously? They sucked toxins out through your feet like they said they would? Keep us posted. I may have to try them. Are they expensive?

Starwoodgal said...

Our local news did a series on things seen on TV. Those fell under the scam results.

I'd be interested to know what kind of results you have. Let us know.

asthmagirl said...

I too have seen the programs that rated these as "less than productive".

On the other hand, there's nothing better than waking up to the smell of bacon!

KD @ A Bit Squirrelly said...

Yeah foot detox! I want to do a body cleanse but I am a chicken. This seems easier.

Lisa J said...

I have seen these before and was just waiting for a personal testimony from some one I know and trust. So do you think we should all go out and buy some too? Hey would you also check out the colon cleansing system too and let me know if it works good?

tj said...

...lol...Yeah, I have to admit I looked reeeal hard at those on the store shelf but I didn't buy any. I was kinda waiting to hear the reviews on 'em to see what people were sayin'...

...And I'd hold off on the clothes shopping 'cause you never know, you may be so detoxed tomorrow that you may not feel like wearing anything! (note to 'tsannie': if MPM shows up at your doorstep in the buff - call the doctor stat!:o)

...And Dora's probably off searchin' for whatever those things sucked outta ya! lol... ;o)

...Happy Friday! Blessings too...

Deb said...

I can live vicariously through your experiences. Honestly, I am a bit of a scaredy cat when it comes to these kinds of things.
Good luck!

Daryl said...

Oh. My. Bob.

You must check out:

http://dispatchesfromtheisland.blogspot.com/2008/02/foots-pads-again.html


:-Daryl

Adventure girl wanna be said...

hahahaha! I've been wondering about those. Keep us updated please. What is spoon bread?

I made up my own award! It is for "bein' sweet to a newbie". I am giving you one. You can pick it up here: http://adventuregirlwannabee.blogspot.com/2008/09/thank-you-for-being-so-sweet-to-newbie.html

Share the love by passing it to people who were extra sweet to you in your very beginning days;)

noble pig said...

No you did not buy these! The Wild Boar and I roar every time we see them on TV!

Country Girl said...

I bought them a few years ago. Was not impressed. Did not lose weight. I found them in the Isabella Catalogue, which is a catalogue that I trusted. I thought I felt a little less toxic, however.

Kidding.

Mental P Mama said...

PEOPLE: I am loving this. Maybe it is psychological, and maybe not. But I have to tell you that I feel GREAT. And I know I am screaming. And I'm going to do all seven days. pffffft.

Egghead said...

Those things couldn't get through the calluses on my hooves. I'm doomed to stay like I am much to the farmers chagrin.

Tonjia said...

they turned black? oh that is just to creepy.

I have always wanted to try them..

Indy said...

Can you believe that someone sold this idea and had it packaged? Why can't I come up with something to make some dough like this? I wish it worked...would you buy it again for the dreams?

Sassy said...

Oh WOW...I haven't seen those before...I will get me some if you think they work...let us know...wouldn't that be awesome if our pounds were sucked right out?Cuz...my problem is I want to have a good body, but NOT AS MUCH AS i WANT DESSERT...

Debbie said...

I JUST saw these yesterday in a BBB insert and wondered about them! Please keep us posted because I was heading out to buy a set, if I ever got up out of my reclining position this weekend.

I believe in the power of the foot and reflexology and am very interested :)

I've definitely had happy feet lately with my New Balance and have always been "foot focused". Um, thinking a foot post now.....

Debbie said...

Oh, YES, please go shopping!

Sassy said...

Oh and I agree with adventure girl wanna be...YOU DESERVE AN AWARD LIKE THAT...because you were very kind to me and remain so...I feel I have made a very long distant friend...

How do you make awards? And how do you get them...I see some blogs with tons of them...and Mama I am real curious about the Blogher...this is a stupid question I know but is that something you can make money off of by having on your blog? I am seriously so not savvy when it comes to these things...help me mama...please.

Joanie said...

I've been really curious about these...you'll have to keep us posted. I'm thinking gross????

Camellia said...

I want some.