Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Vicarious Mama


Since I ended this past weekend practically able to palpate my own liver, and barely squeezing into my sweats, I spent a great deal of time yesterday reading up on various cleanses and diets. It served as a way to restart my motivation for a healthier me, and I must tell you that I feel better already.

Dooce tweeted this ditty yesterday:  dooce The urge to grab a handful of chocolate Teddy Grahams is almost unbearable.  

As you may know by now, she is on the 21 day cleanse that Oprah did.  Here is the link to Oprah's blog about it...In case you don't want to read it, The short version is that she talks about how much she wants a glass of wine.  Bordeaux to be exact.  And Heather wants Teddy Grahams.  Since I am not a big fan of either Bordeaux or Teddy Grahams, I'm starting to think this may actually work for me.

My morning progressed, and as I sipped my lemony water, I read all about the virtues of  Zinc from Dr. Oz.  And also more of his thoughts on fiber.  He really loves all things fiber.  I really like Dr. Oz.


He and Oprah have educated me about many things--like the omentum.  I don't like my omentum.   
Or any other omentum for that matter. Here they are holding up some omenti.  Is that the plural of omentum?  I don't even like the thought of one of these suckers much less a plethora of them.  Don't you love the word plethora?  Annie waxed most eloquently about it yesterday.  You should pay her a visit.  The nice photo she used will help you get this picture out of your mind.  You don't want an omentum either on your belly or etched in your eyes.  Believe me.

I got on the treadmill and read my latest issue of Fitness.  Motivated, I enjoyed some poached salmon for lunch.  Followed by a grilled cheese.  I made a crustless one for the wounded Bird. Nobody should have to eat alone.

Then I read the entire 5 Factor website.  This is how the movie stars stay slim.  Supposedly.  I think my dog Dora incorporates this method in her particular regime.  Several meals each day.  Right Dora? This is Dora's face waiting for one of those small meals.

And below is her face after a mini meal.  Doesn't she look great?  Nary a double chin to be found. You know things are getting rough when you wish you looked more like the family dog....

And as I write this, I just noticed an email from the folks at the South Beach Diet.  Apparently I signed up for this daily newsletter they create.  I sat and read the whole thing, and I feel really fit now.

I may be doing more of this in the future.  

26 comments:

Chesapeake Bay Woman said...

I want red wine right now and I'm not even on a cleanse or a diet. Sounds like I need to be....

Good for you for at least reading the stuff and educating yourself. In the back of my mind I know what I need to do, but my body just can't follow directions very well.

winetipper said...

How many calories are per minute are burned by reading? If only!

TSannie said...

Oh dear...way too much to think about...where's my short stack???

Why o why can't we just WISH pounds away???

Jules said...

Is it maxi link Tuesday?

asthmagirl said...

So you're saying it's the reading material that determines our level of fitness?

I'm going to quit reading the pub menu immediately! And no more labels at the grocery store! How bad is watching the commercials on TV?

Ann from Montana said...

Well, I'm decidedly not an Oprah fan and have a negative knee-jerk reaction to most things O so bear that in mind if you read on... but O with all of her $$$$ and ability to have her own cook and nutritionist AND trainer - has NEVER been able to maintain.

And while I don't think that has to be the rule for the rest of us, it does speak to the difficulty.

My hope is not necessairily the svelteness of my youth but more a healthy and fit body that can do the things I love to do. Right now it is not feeling so fit and healthy...

Mental P Mama said...

AG: Absolutely! Just go get a Fitness magazine and you'll see;)

Ann: I completely agree. Just trying to maintain is an effort these days. $%#@$ metabolism.

brneyedgal967 said...

I love to read about other people who are eating healthy and exercising. I love reading the articles and recipes in my Natural Health magazine.

But can I motivate my ass to eat healthy and exercise? Nope. I think I need to start with baby steps. Like only one piece of bacon with my eggs and hashbrowns. Agh.

Daryl said...

I am so laughing ... I promise if you join WW you will lose the weight and keep it off .. and you can have wine .. and whine all you want ... what the heck is that yucky stuff they are holding?

:-Daryl

Lisa J said...

If it were just so simple as to read and the pounds fall away. I would be so skinny. But oh well. I love to eat, I love to eat fun food and I love life. One of these days I will get motivated to get healthier, hope it won't be too late then!

Ok, Where Was I? said...

You know things are getting rough when you wish you looked more like the family dog....LOL!

I too have a dog named Dora and would totally look like her. she's super tiny and muscular.

Krysta said...

So if I watch people working out on the internet, I lose a couple pounds? If I read about fitness online, I will lose weight? Sign me up for this, wait! I want to buy stock in this little business plan of yours because you are gonna be rich.

Mental P Mama said...

Krysta, I'll let you have some options....

Fat & Sassy said...

I am so sick of being the thick chick, the beautiful person kidnapped by the ugly body...you are an inspiration for me...I'm trying really really hard to stick to my weight watcher points and track like a good girl, but life sure keeps getting in the way...how is your little birl, her poor mouth must be mighty sore, bless her heart. We have a doggy here at our home, too. What a life! He sleeps and eats and pulls our son on the skateboard for exercise, that's it...maybe I should start pulling my son on his skateboard! I wonder how many calories that burns??????

Fat & Sassy said...

Your little birl? What the crap? I meant bird...say it B I R D... sometimes I feel like thumper
♥your blog

Debbie said...

I have maintained the same crappy diet for years and never gained weight until old meno...hence metabo. I maintained the same crappy weight for the past 4 years UNTIL I got a job where I MOVED my ass P/T. Physical. 4 months lost 10 lbs. My problem is physical, or lack of it, that keeps the weight on. Left job...gained back.

MP...vitamins are One A Day Weight Smart Advanced.

When you have a colonoscopy doesn't that prep count as a cleanse? LOL I guess not :(

Girl, I think you're on the right track...just keep walking around it ((hugs))

Keetha said...

I admire anyone who can do that cleanse thing, but it's not something would voluntarily do. Although it might be worth it just to be able to gloat about it. :-)

Caution said...

Eeewww. I shudder to think what I might be feeling like if I had not read this post. Thank goodness I did! Now I'm healthy for another week or so (but I do admit I wonder what it would feel like to be at the end of the 21 day cleansing.)

noble pig said...

I think blogging burns calories don't they? I'm sure it does...blog away!!!!

Don Mills Diva said...

Twenty-one days of fasting sounds like insanity to me!

Pass the wine and Teddy Grahams.

K.C. said...

I loved reading this post...I felt fit just reading it...

I laughed out loud when you said you read the entire South Beach Diet email and felt fit.. I can so relate..

Here's hoping it all works out! Kayce

Bear Naked said...

So you can read when you are on your treadmill?
I have been trying to read when I am on the recumbent bicycle but I find I can't hold the book steady enough.

MamaGeek said...

I LOVE that dog. And am I wrong to think that Dr. Oz is hott?

Flea said...

Hmm. I hate diets. Maybe that's why I'm so large. But when I diet and lose, I gain back more when I stop. I loved Body For Life and would have stuck with it, but circumstances (the family from Hell) wouldn't allow it at the time. Giving up an addiction, rather than dieting, has helped. My beloved Ben'n'Jerry's had to go. Now it's coming off slowly, but permanently.

Country Girl said...

I love the word plethora.

I've also decided to emmbrace my Reubenesqueness. I made up that word. You know all those Reuben paintings of fat ladies? Well, I'm not that bad. But I'm embracing it, nonetheless.

holly said...

no no no. first the rice diet. then that one where you drink nothing but raspberry shakes. then a day of slimfast before two weeks of atkins. and THEN you do the south beach diet. that's the way of things. really.