Cheating

I have a little confession.

  I have cheated on my diet a little bit this week. 

 Forgive me fellow hungry blogsters, for I have consumed:

1)  A Fresca.  But in my defense it was Bridge night.

2) 1/2 cup of fat free cottage cheese.  I know, cottage cheese is cheating on a diet?  But I truly feel I was allowed because I had worked out for an hour, and had 45 minutes on the treadmill that day. I was hungry.

3) 13 almonds instead of 11.  They were small.  Really.

4) An additional 1/2 cup grape tomatoes.  I can't help it, I love those suckers.

5) 4 teaspoons of olive oil on Tuesday instead of my alloted 3.  I couldn't help it.  I was watching Giada (Everyday Italian) on the Food Channel.  I won't watch that any more for a while.  Trust.

6) I had 5 ounces of meat last night instead of 4.  I am going to do extra cardio today to make up for it.

On a positive note, the alcohol-abstinence has not been as big a deal as I thought it would.  The food on the Sonoma Diet is delicious.  And everyone is still alive here.  The children are leaving for a ski weekend after school today, so that will help;)

Anybody else have anything they want to confess share?  Hm?

This-n-That Thursday

Wafting through my mind this week are a few things like these:

• I just noticed that my vitamins are for people over 50.  But I'm going to keep taking them because my mother always told me I was advanced.
• If everything has a purpose, then what purpose does dust have?
• I saw Carrie Fisher on The Bonnie Hunt Show, and it made me feel so much better about myself.  Sorry Carrie.
• I cannot get Neil Diamond's "Sweet Caroline" out of my head-- It's the karaoke version where everyone screams "so good, so good, so good!"
• When you play Bridge without wine, it is hard to remember all the cards.  True story.
• Speaking of Vitamins, and that seems to be just about all I do, I have a serious crush on Vitamin D.
• Do not ever eat a big spinach salad with red cabbage, fresh broccoli and black beans 30 minutes before an hour-long MRI.  Ever.  If you live, you will regret it.
• If you take a picture of cheese, what does it say?

That's it.  I am off to do some cardio and chop some more vegetables.  Have a lovely day my friends.  Day 3 was a snap;)

Surviving Cocktail Hour

When you are in Wave One on The Sonoma Diet, you are not allowed any alcohol.  At all. For ten days.  Today is Day 3 for me, which means that if you are reading this, I am not in jail.  Yet.  Yes folks, Mental P has made it through two grueling blissful nights enjoying her family sans the benefit of a buffer a glass of wine.

Here are some coping skills I have honed the last 36 hours of deprivation cleansing.  You, too, can use these tested techniques during that certain time of day when you feel like you might kill someone:

1.  Do some more laundry.  You know there is always something else to wash, and no one can see you cry in the laundry room.

2.  Read.  Like, a book or something.

3.  Write a letter--that activity is actually fun.

4.  Clean off your desk.

5.  Take a nap.

6.  Take a bath with Johnson's Baby Bath for Cranky Babies.  It has a nice Lavender scent.

7.  Start dinner.  But be careful, because there is a whole lot of chopping involved with all these vegetables.

8.  Take a sniff of Squazz's scotch.

9.  Give yourself a nice facial.

10.  Tweeze.  In ernest.

11.  Eat your long-awaited snack for the day.  I got to have 11 almonds on Monday.  Yesterday was 1/2 cup of grape tomatoes....I felt like I had died and gone to heaven.

12.  Take one more nice deep sniff of Squazz's scotch.

By the time you complete most of the things here, cocktail time has effortlessly passed, dinner is ready, and you get to eat your carefully measured allotment of protein, and your unlimited broccoli, cauliflower and asparagus.  On your nine inch plate.  

In all honesty, this is a very fun and tasty program.  I rarely feel deprived of food.  My wine is a whole 'nother story.  But I am 33% there!  In Wave Two, you get to have a glass of wine with a meal of your choice.  I am thinking Day 11 might feature a breakfast varietal.  Wonder what goes with All Bran?

Anybody have any other suggestions?

A Conversation

Yesterday morning, as I was preparing the smallest slice of whole grain toast on the planet, my husband Squazz sat reading my blog post.  The following lovely exchange ensued:

Squazz:  Squazz*, you cannot have a drink for 10 days on this Sonoma Diet????

MPM:  Nope.  But remember that South Beach Diet is two weeks without any booze, so this one is lots better.  Don't you think?

Squazz:  Can you do this?

MPM: (inhaling the intoxicating aroma of her dry toast) Of course I can.  That isn't very nice, Squazz.

Squazz:  I know you can do it, Squazz....I wonder if Tige's condo is available.  Maybe I should go to Florida for the next week or so.

MPM:  (staring longingly at her next course: 2 hard boiled eggs) Fine.  Go.  It may be a loooong ten days, but I am going to do this.  By the way, look at me; I am wasting away already.

*Yes, we call each other Squazz.  Don't ask me what it means or why because I have no idea.

I'm Hungry

Today, we start a new health kick with some of our favorite bloggers.  If you want to join in, go visit Big Hair Envy, and figure out how you want to get in shape.  I am feeling sorta blah.  I don't know why.  Maybe because I am 40 pounds heavier than I was 2 years ago.  Maybe because I have a stupid skinny little doctor who won't give me any thyroid meds.  Maybe it's the bottle glass of wine I drink at night. Maybe it really is about portion control.  If you take the serving spoon and scoop stroganoff into your gullet mouth, does that count as calories?  What does it mean when your muffin top actually gets firm?  Too much lifting of the arms?  Bending of the elbows?

All I can tell you is this, if you are looking for my usual, charming self for the next ten days. --  Are you listening Squazz?  -- Stay away.  Because Mama is going on the Sonoma Diet.

It won't be pretty, but I hope to get started on this load little bit of weight I seem to have gained.  And I can have a glass of wine in 10 days.  I don't blame you if you stay away until then.  My kids may be looking for a home by tomorrow.

Thanks.

Playing With My Toy

More of Mama's well-fed animal kingdom.

I cannot wait to actually learn how to use this camera.

Chubby Girl

Wonder if her doctor will give her a little pill.